Why was I saved for the last days again?

I know I have so much else I am behind blogging about. My original intention was to update about Thanksgiving and all I am thankful for and then finals and coming home (which is why I have time to update my blog). However, a horrible event in history happened today and although I was going to post this after catching up my thoughts can't help but be directed at this horrible shooting.

I remember when I was younger and watched the twin towers fall down on that sad day of Sept. 11, 2001, my mom said how big of an even this will be in history and to record how I felt about it in my journal at the time and I did. I feel like unfortunately another event has occurred where I should do the same. I just wish I didn't have to record my impressions of event as devastating as these. I know we are a "chosen generation" saved for these last days but if the world continues to become more and more wicked- I honestly don't know if I am stronger or why I am supposedly strong enough to see the world fall apart.

This day, at least up to the news and knowledge at this point, 27 victims were killed at an Elementary shooting in Connecticut. 18 of these victims were pure innocent children, aged 5-10. Those killed mostly were Kindergardeners. These are children who are not even at the age of accountability yet. This are the children who's attributes we are suppose to develop in ourselves. It breaks my heart that a man can take away these innocent lives. It makes me force myself to see the big picture and how grateful I am for the Plan of Happiness and the knowledge I have that these children died in innocence and our saved by the mercy and pure love of Christ. It is my hope and prayer that the families of these children can gain a testimony of this and rely on the strength of this plan.

After hearing this devastating news I went to pick up Will from school for lunch, who hopefully is completely oblivious to the shooting. As I walked into the office I saw all the younger kids out in the playground playing and laughing- it literally was hard trying to take my mind off the idea that it was kids just like them at that elementary school. But I checked Will off and we went to go get Wendy's, that took my mind off of it which was nice. Until a prison guard with an inmate came into order and Will's eyes got really big and the first thing that I thought of was "Did this man hurt little kids too?" But then once again the younger kids innocence prevailed as Will said after he left, "Well he looked nice." This made me, the older and supposedly wiser 19 year old sister feel bad for me thinking this guy was scary. Children are so unjudgemental and love about anyone. Its sad that they were the true victims in this shooting.

Just before I came home, there was also another shooting. This one extremely close to home and even closer because my own Mom was at the site an hour and a half before it happened. Just down the street almost at the Clackamas Town Center mall there was a shooting. Luckily my Mom had to leave in time for Karsyn's piano lessons but a man came in and I believe he killed 2 others besides himself and injured many. This as well as the school shooting also followed the devastating movie theater shooting from the premiere of the Dark Night in Auroa, CO. 

Childhood me might of witness 9/11 but I don't think it hit me as much as these shootings. If I flew on a plane to New York I might have been scared but that was about the extent of my fear. Now I feel like I have to fear everything and anything... going to a movie, grabbing something at a mall, or going to school. Again, this is a time where we must rely on faith and offer many prayers, especially for these victims. We also need to trust the Lord and his timing that this is our time we are suppose to be on the earth and we were saved for these last days for a reason. But I am going to be selfish and hope the Second Coming comes fast because I don't want to see how much more wicked the world can become. Maybe the world will end on the 21st as the Mayan calendar says, well of course it won't but I at least hope all these crazy shootings stop. Maybe people really do believe the world is going to end and they are just doing stupid stuff. 

Regardless of the gun control laws (which I still don't believe are to blame), and politics (even President Obama cried during his address as being a Father himself), I pledge to try to be the best parent I can be one day to raise a righteous family with values. I feel like a good upbringing and childhood with supportive loving parents can make all the difference. Oh, and sorry future chillens, but you won't be playing any violent video games either. 

Let's all try to focus on the true meaning of Christmas this season and the bigger picture and as the world becomes more wicked, realize we have to make up the difference and be even stronger.